


Trial and Fatal Error

by brie_and_bread



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Abuse, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, M/M, nothing romantic or smutty happens it's just Illumi being a bad person lmao
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:34:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24257473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brie_and_bread/pseuds/brie_and_bread
Summary: (NOTE: Killua is about 7 or 8 years old in this)Killua has another training session with Illumi, he hopes to impress him this time.
Relationships: Illumi Zoldyck/Killua Zoldyck
Comments: 4
Kudos: 33





	Trial and Fatal Error

‘’No, Kil, you’re holding it wrong again.’’

Killua blinked, then quizzically brought the knife he was wielding to his face.  
‘’Huh? Really?’’ His face fell. ‘’I thought my grip was pretty strong though…’’

‘’Yeah, It was okay.’’ Killua stared down at his feet, painfully aware of the type of speech that would follow. ‘’The key word being ‘okay’ ’’ He paused, as if to put emphasis on what he was about to say next. ‘’You can never be too safe. You have to hold it tighter, think of it as one of your limbs. Otherwise, there’s still a chance the enemy could make you drop it, or even snatch it from you, and then, what would you do? You’d be left weaponless, while your opponent would have a second one on hand.’’

The boy compliantly nodded to show he understood, but couldn’t help but roll his eyes internally. They were just practicing, it wasn’t like he was facing imminent death or anything.

‘’Okay then, is this better?’’ Killua asked, presenting his new, improved grip on the knife, coupled with his usual fighting stance.

To his surprise though, Illumi didn’t even bother looking as he casually walked across the dimly lit room and over to his brother, crouching down next to him and fixing his hold on the weapon himself. Killua was admittedly kind of insulted that Illumi didn’t even trust him to hold a knife correctly, but concluded that starting an argument over it was a waste of time, Illumi would probably win it anyway. Maybe it just meant he wasn’t strong enough yet, Killua realized. He intently stared at Illumi’s hands firmly placing his own around the handle until they, done with their common task, retreated back to their owner’s side.

‘’Alright, now just combine that with your stance from earlier and you’re good to go. It’ll be more difficult this way for your opponent to knock you down.’’ Illumi concluded, satisfied, as he got up and turned back around. His thin dark hair flew around him, in synch with the spin of his head.

‘’So, my stance was good...?’’ Killua timidly asked, a hint of hope in his voice.  
Illumi temporarily stopped in his tracks as he glanced back at the wide-eyed, expectant little boy.  
‘’Yup!’’ He responded cheerfully, and while his lips curled into a definite smile, the rest of his face stayed as deadpan as ever. ‘’You got pretty much everything else down perfectly, Kil.’’ He playfully tousled the boy’s head of white, wispy hair. ’’But obviously, I wouldn’t expect anything less from my adorable little brother.’’ 

Killua couldn’t hide his childish happiness, practically giggling with joy just from the simple compliment. The frustration he had with himself moments ago was now long forgotten. After mastering darts, the soon-to-be assassin recently had to start training for actual combat. It had been a bit tough on him as the boy, admittedly on the sentimental side, wasn’t quite used to fighting family members just yet, especially Illumi, but Killua still put his heart into every session he had with his brother, resolute to earn his respect. So for his role model to not only notice, but praise his hard work made him feel incredibly validated, proud even. He couldn’t stop smiling, even when his brother had turned back around, the grin lingered for longer than what was really necessary.

As Illumi finally reached his side of the room, Killua suddenly straightened up, already anxious from the thought of what was next. 

‘’So,’’ He grabbed the knife closest to him from the various ones available, which also happened to be the least sharp out of all of them. ‘’As per usual, the second you start moving, I’ll automatically assume our fight has begun, so, you know,’’ Another pause. ‘’ Take your time to think and devise a plan as to avoid making any rash decisions you’ll inevitably regret.’’ The pressure was on.

In truth, Killua hardly ever came up with a serious plan when faced with this situation. Despite his best efforts, his head would frustratingly go throughly blank pretty much every time. The seemingly irrational nervousness ironically came from Illumi himself. He could never quite tell what could be going through his head as he continuously stared at him, but it wasn’t just because Illumi was anticipating Killua’s next moves, no, he knew there was definitely something else. Various heavy, conflicted feelings all coagulated together in two pitch black drops of ink. They were always a bit scary like that, but whenever Illumi asked Killua a question or waited for him to make a decision, he would silently watch him, his face, his hands fumbling together anxiously and his every breath with a rigid, empty expression. Illumi’s eyes were then impossible to look into for Killua. It was like Illumi awaited nothing less than a perfect answer, but simultaneously wanted his little brother to doubt himself and crack under the pressure. Killua never had the courage to mention this to Illumi, but it really upset him, so he often opted to shift his gaze elsewhere as to avoid losing his cool.

The boy sadly had to end up counting on his agility and sharp reflexes to carry him throughout the fight. He would probably lose, in fact, he was absolutely going to lose, Killua knew, but the training hadn’t gotten to the point where it was about winning or losing yet. This was an opportunity for him to show what he had learnt during his previous battles, a way for Killua’s family to make sure the Zoldyck heir was improving as fast as he was supposed to be. Maybe, after he’d have gotten good enough, Illumi wouldn’t feel the need to dauntingly stare at him like that anymore. Then he would just be the cool-headed, yet affectionate Illumi that he loved and admired so much.

Knife firm in his grip, Killua took a deep, somewhat shaky breath and carefully stepped forward.

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo this is my first fanfiction ever and english isn't my first language so like if it sucked I'm sorry but if you liked it another chapter is coming up!
> 
> I love HxH from the bottom of my heart and I've always been interested in Killua and Illumi's relationship, so I decided to write a fanfic about it.


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